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So Now You're a Zombie

A Handbook for the Newly Undead

ebook
1 of 1 copy available
1 of 1 copy available

All aspects of the zombie lifestyle are surveyed in this satirical take on an orientation manual for the newly undead. From how one became a zombie in the first place and the stages of zombification to survival mechanisms, this handbook offers specific advice on everything a fresh zombie needs to know about "life" expectancy, hunting techniques, hitching a ride, hand-to-mouth combat, and feeding etiquette. Instructions for extracting the living from boarded up farmhouses and broken down vehicles are included along with dozens of helpful diagrams outlining attack strategies such as the Ghoul Reach, the Flanking Zak, the Bite Hold, and the Aerial Fall for securing human prey and their all-important flesh and brains.

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  • Reviews

    • Publisher's Weekly

      August 16, 2010
      There is more to undeath than shambling around in search of brains to eat, but not much more, according to this short but detailed look at the new zombie, or “zed,” lifestyle. Filled with deadpan tips on how to succeed in the coming zombie apocalypse, it covers the basics of caring for decomposing flesh (“If you experience an extreme freeze... your extremities should continue to function until they fall off”), practical suggestions for overcoming obstacles, and instructions for attacking the living (“The only thing more lethal than you is you on fire!”). The blood-splattered pages contain copious diagrams, such as a zombie food pyramid, pie charts of infection methods, and instructions for operating doorknobs. The illustrations are as grossly explicit as the text is employee-handbook underplayed, making this an excellent choice for the zombie completist.

Formats

  • Kindle Book
  • OverDrive Read
  • EPUB ebook

Languages

  • English

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